“Gark?”

My best friend from college and high school came for a visit last week.  My daughter was enjoying his company.  They had a lot of fun.  In fact, Cory had his brain melted by her cuteness.  She sand “twinkle Twinkle Little Star” which comes out as “ginke ginke itl are.”  She also called out “Touchdown” when we played football on PlayStation. 

After he left, my daughter goes walking around the house saying “Gark?”.  My brother’s name is Mark and they do resemble each other. Sow e said ”first of all, his name is Cory.”  To which she responded “oree”.  When we told her he went home, she put her hands up and said “Home?” as if to say “we are home”.  We then had to tell her that he went to his home.

Beware, she is so cute she will MELT YOUR BRAIN.

All I ever needed to know about life I learned from watching Stargate.

There are entire books with this theme.  I myself own both the Star Trek and Star Trek the Next Generation. 

This will likely become a recurring theme.  It will include “lessons” from any of the Stargate series and movie including but not limited to SG-1 and Atlantis.

Now without further ado:

A little Jello goes a long way:  Whether it is just to help someone feel better or because you are infected with an alien probe, sometimes Jello is the best remedy.

“I want to live, I want to experience the universe, and I want to eat pie.”: Who doesn’t?  Experiencing life is almost as important as merely living.  And you doesn’t want pie?

An original greeting can help you stand out from the rest:“Hello” is too commonplace.  Try “Greetings” or better yet “Kumtria”.

Sometimes not understanding a thing can bring great pleasure: “If you immediately know the candlelight is fire, the meal was cooked a long time ago.”  For many years SG-1 fans have contemplated the meaning of these words.  They inspire creative thinking and philosophical discussions.

If you have leave, it is best to actually leave…unless the Asguard need you for an urgent mission: Vacations are important.  Take them when you can.

Top X Signs that you are a JMU Football fan where X is greater than 5.

OK, I am starting to have football withdrawals. I have been thinking about this for a while. So here is what I have thought of so far.

Duke Dog

1. You name your dog “Duke” so that you can have your own “Duke Duke Duke Duke Daawwg”.
2. You name your cat “Blue Hen” so you can watch Duke chase him.
3. You are sure that Superman wears a JMU uniform #7. (Now out of date)
4. Even when the team is losing, you can still say “our band is better than your band”.
5. You really want one of those inflatable dogs for your front door.
6. Your daughter’s first word is “Duuuuuukes” and is prompted by “First Down J – M – U”.
7. Your daughter’s first two-word “sentence” is “Duke Dog”.
8. You own a purple cowboy hat (or other random accessory).
9. You own thermal underwear and only wear them to football games late in the football season.
10. You secretly wish your thermal underwear were purple and gold even though it is worn under your clothes (well most of the time anyway).
11. Your happy place is section 10 row M seat 20 of Brideforth Stadium.
12. You get all geeked out about meeting anyone named “Showker”.
13. You think the Dukettes are absolutely gorgeous even though you’ve never seen any of them up close.
14. You try to convert your friends and family who still root for that orange and blue team in Charlottesville to JMU fans because “it is a more pure form of the game.”
15. You think “blue” is a really funny shade of purple.

Feel free to add your own.

Two Months Ago

Two months ago my world was turned on its ear.

Two months ago, I lost a job I loved.

Two months ago, I lost my identity as a wage earner.

Two months ago, I realized how far behind my son is in his social interaction.

Two months ago, I was forced in to a greater responsibility for my children…and all the stress that goes with it.

Two months ago, I lost faith in myself.

So far, I have not landed on my feet.  I am still unemployed.  For the first time since college, I went on a client interview and was rejected.  For now, I am trying to stay sane…everything else is gravy.

A Sign of the Times

We finally did it.  Out old 2001 Dodge Grand Caravan had finally pushed us too far and we opted to replace it…with a shiny 2006 Dodge Grand Caravan.

Bells, Whistles and 110,000 fewer miles may all sound good, but what about the gas?

I was actually upset that I had filled up the tank the day before we traded it in. 

We only got $1,700 for the van.  Not surprising considering the big dent I put in the back fender when Melody was a week old and I was taking her to her doctor’s appointment with a grand total of 12 hours sleep in that week (I exaggerate for effect…but not by much).  Scratches on the sides and a transmission that was leaking could not have helped our resale value.

So the $60 of gas I put in represented 3.5% of the value of the car.  When I took the new car for a test drive I noticed it was at half a tank.  That means that I was going to “lose” $30 in gas.

After completing the paperwork I go to drive the new van home only to notice they filled the tank for me.

For some reason, I felt better about spending $16,000 on a car with a full tank of gas.

Low Self Esteem

I have suffered from low self esteem all my life.  Mostly it is a concern over my weight.  Some of it is a certain perceived social awkwardness.

I thought I was improving in the self esteem category until I went to Las Vegas a couple of weeks ago.  I lost all of the money I brought for gambling, but that isn’t the point.  You see, I was hungry one night around 10:00.  So I went down to the casino to get a bite.  When i got off the elevator a beautiful young woman called me over to her. 

She said “are you alone?”

Now I was not with someone at the time, though my Mother and Brother were with me on the trip, and my Brother and I were rooming together.  But being the technical person that I am, I said “Yes”

She said “Do you want some company?”

At this point I finally realized that she was a prostitute.  Call me slow if you like, but it really did take me this long to even consider the possibility.  Partially because the was very pretty.  I said “No thanks” and kept walking.  When I told my brother about this the next day he asked how much she would have been.  I am proud to say that I didn’t get that far.

Here is where the self-esteem thing comes in to play.  You see, I was flattered by the prostitute considering me.  My self-image is such that I could not imagine anyone (other than my wife) wanting to be with me.  Even though she was “on the clock” it was nice to know that I am not that repulsive.

Wow, that sounds even more pathetic than I thought.

The Good Samaritan

Yesterday afternoon I was sitting in my chair finishing up the latest episode of Burn Notice when my bride came home with the kids.  I only had 10 minutes left on the episode, so after I helped get everyone settled down and rotated through the potty I returned to my show. 

Five minutes later there was a knock at our door.

I cursed under my breath and went to send whomever it was away.  Usually, it is a religious person handing out crap that I don’t want.  But this time it was a motorcyclist saying that there was something leaking out of the bottom of my wife’s van.

I said it was probably just condensation from the air conditioning, but that I would take a look anyway.  He said that condensation should have evaporated and that he had followed the leak for 3 miles.  I look under the car and find that the transmission is leaking severely.  I immediately drive it to the repair shop.  About a block from the shop it stopped changing gears out of first.

That guy saved me having to have my wife’s car towed the next morning when we would have noticed.  I also would have left for work and we would have had to find an alternate means of transportation in the morning.  The heads up this guy gave me allowed me to get my carpool to pick me up (Mondays are usually my day).

I didn’t get his name.  I have no way of contacting him.  He was kind without reward.  And I thank him and wish him good karma.

Pet Peeve of the Day

I just hate when I get to the last character of my password and fat-finger it so that I am not sure if I typed an extra character (or two) or not?  I end up having to go back to the beginning and start again.

Wall-E vs Number 5

Does anyone else see a similarity?

Johnny5

Wall-E Title

New Project

As if I didn’t have enough going on at the moment, I have started a new project.  Funding may be an issue with this one, but feel free to take a look: http://electricvehicleproject.wordpress.com/